It’s OK to not be OK.
If I was asked for my number one piece of advice – it would be:
“It’s OK to not be OK.”
We live in a society today where there is just an unbelievable amount of pressure. Pressure to be the best, to be the smartest, to be the most popular or the thinnest, to live the healthiest lifestyle and be the fittest – or even just pressure to have the perfect relationship. We all have felt these pressures at some point or another but most of us live with some sort of pressure every day. That is just so unbelievably exhausting.
Pressure comes from everywhere and anywhere – family, friends, ourselves, the TV, the media – especially with the rise in popularity of reality TV and social media (don’t get me wrong, I love both of those!). It is easier now than ever, to compare ourselves to anyone and comparisons are so unhealthy – it’s the quickest and easiest way of putting ourselves down, lowering our self worth and believing we are not good enough. Comparing yourself to other people is giving yourself the permission to put unnecessary pressure on yourself.
Unnecessary pressure leads to fear of failure or of not being ‘good enough’.
Fear is the ultimate anxiety.
“Comparing yourself to other people is giving yourself the permission to put unnecessary pressure on yourself.”
We are living in a time where experiencing anxiety is becoming increasingly more common – and no wonder!
(Of course I’m not saying anxiety always comes from feeling pressure – but anxiety does come through the fear of one thing or another.)
Have you ever felt incredibly burnt out, exhausted and just totally tired? We all have at some point. Have you ever noticed how those feelings of total exhaustion come after a time when we have just been constantly on the go? It happens to me all the time!
We work so hard to achieve the ‘perfection’ that we are after, or to live up to expectations and work through the pressure of society that we don’t allow ourselves the down time we need anymore. Worse than that – if we feel tired, more times than not, we don’t allow ourselves to rest and even feel guilty for feeling that way in the first place!
Because of all this pressure, it’s become increasingly more common to feel guilty when we aren’t feeling 100% or when we need that ‘me time’ or a break – the guilt appears because we genuinely believe we don’t have time to rest, or we don’t deserve that rest. Everything that we are wanting to do and that our bodies are telling us to do in order to recover, are no longer options. Perhaps it’s because if we do these things we feel we have failed in one way or another as a human being:
Well, let me tell you – they are all options and we should feel free enough to take them when we need it. IT’S OK TO NOT BE OK! Your body is the most intelligent biochemical machine on the planet and we need to trust how we are feeling – feelings don’t lie. It’s so easy to ignore how our bodies and minds are feeling while we work through this pressure we put upon ourselves but inevitably they WILL catch up with you and that’s when the exhaustion kicks in.
It’s exhausting pretending to be someone we’re not.
It’s exhausting to keep running when our legs are tired.
It’s exhausting going against every fibre in our body.
So allow yourself to feel tired! Allow yourself to be sad, to cry, to need a hug. You don’t have to be super woman or super man and be perfect and happy all the time. I think there’s this stigma that has been attached to being a positive person – that if you’re a positive person then you’re never sad or low. Since we all want to be ‘positive’ people, being down in the dumps just isn’t an option. Well that’s totally wrong. You can still be a positive person – you’re just having a bad day.
Allow yourself that bad day. Your body knows what it needs and when it needs it. Like I said, feelings don’t lie. So if you’re feeling a certain way, more likely than not, it’s because your body needs some TLC and it needs to work through those feelings. The more you crush them and hide them, the stronger they will appear later on. Be kind to yourself and work through those times you aren’t feeling totally amazing.
We aren’t told these words enough – It’s OK to not be OK – but they are such true words and every one of us can benefit from hearing them every now and again. We need to be reminded that not everything always has to be perfect; we don’t always have to be on the go. Those moments of feeling low and awful are there to remind us that we need to look after ourselves. It’s our bodies way of telling us – ‘hold on a second, I need some attention to’. So listen to your body, stop giving into all the pressures you face, all the comparisons and fears and remember:
“It’s OK to not be OK.”